Dear Big Daddy,

A Republican Assembly member, Joel Anderson, appropriated one of your signature phrases by saying “money is the mother’s milk of terrorism.” Does this mean terrorism and politics have the same mother? And who’s the father?

–Word games and other torture

Dear Wordplayer,

I guess it’s time to put on my

Dear Big Daddy,

I’ve been a lobbyist for years, but I’ve never been treated as rudely as I was by a member recently. I was waiting to speak to her when she ducked out a side door, went downstairs and helped narrowly defeat my bill. My friends are telling me to get over it, but

Dear Big Daddy,

Somebody spring Joe Francis from jail, ’cause the legislators are going wild! Which was the better legislative throw-down: Fabian N

Dear Big Daddy,

Did you come back as one of those whales trying to swim to the capital? Is that why John Garamendi wanted so badly to speak with the them?

–Ouueeeiii hooopeeeiiiaaa yooouuuiiieeeuuu

Dear Vowel Movement,

Did you think that just because those whales looked like they were on the eviction end

Hey Big Daddy,

The year started out with big talk of prison reform. But the debate detoured into the governor’s “death chamber” and pardons for Paris Hilton. Can’t we stay on topic?

–DCA has ADD

Dear hypocrite looking for an excuse to bring up Paris Hilton,

I was wondering why people hate this Paris

California State Senator Tom Harman campaigned for his office last year as the “conservative” candidate, rolling out the endorsements of a bogus taxpayer-rights group and a liberal Republican organization. He and his surrogates insisted his diaper tax-proposing ways were a thing of the past–a fad–perhaps a holdover inclination from his time on the City Council

Think of this as a postcard from the other Los Angeles.Not the weather-is-great-wish-you-were-here variety, but the let-me-out-of-here-I-deserve-better kind.

It’s from the crowded immigrant neighborhoods south and east of the Civic Center. And its authors are junior-high-school students taking part in the Campaign for College Opportunity.

They write candidly and insightfully about their hopes and frustrations,

Dear Big Daddy,

As an environmentalist, I’m sick of Schwarzenegger pretending he’s the second coming of Rachel Carson. Now people are saying he’s a better environmental advocate than Al Gore. Please.

–Living green, seeing red

Dear Lawn Gnome,

This coming August 4 will be my 20-year deathiversary. I’m expecting a party, folks, with

Dear Big Daddy,Did you see that Mervyn Dymally made a witness cry while chairing the Assembly Health Committee the other week? You were the most infamous committee chairman ever. Was Dymally maintaining order, or just being mean? –Weeping witness watcher Dear WWW,At some point someone got the idea that we shouldn’t make laws without seeing

Dear Big Daddy,

Those of us who work for elected officials often have to go above and beyond. But a friend of mine was recently called upon to brief their member while the member was, how to put this delicately, making a No. 2. They’re the same gender, but still.

–Never saw that on